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Monday, December 19, 2011

This is why I was fat when I was younger...

1. Dunkaroos.
....i used to just hoard all the vanilla icing cups and finger to the mouth with that shit.


2. That gooey pure sugar shit that came in tubes.
....oh don't even pretend like this wasn't crack for 4-year olds...I used to sell this shit in the back alley of my private school in 2nd grade...I kind of wish that was a lie.


3. Reading.
...this probably didn't help...but god damn those Captain Underpants comics were fucking epic.


4. Corndogs.
....it's a gateway drug, really.

5. Ramen noodles (cooked or uncooked).
...god damn I could eat that shit any way/shape/form...and that is why I am proud to be an AMERICAN...and white.

6. Cake
...fat kids love cake...or so I've been told in numerous rap songs.


7. This guy.
...god damn you cookie monster...you brilliant genius you.


8. Ellio's Pizza.
...it's a gateway drug, really.


9. Eating spoonfuls of sugar...multiple times a day...
...no seriously I used to sit on my kitchen counter and eat pure sugar...then one day the sugar container was "misplaced" by my parents...only to have my parents find me hiding in the living room shoving spoons full of sugar into my mouth hours later.


10. Being fat probably made me fatter.
...well...it did.
Posted by Paige at 8:48 AM

8 comments:

  1. I used to dump so much sugar in my Rice Krispies, so much that it absorbed all the milk and made it crunchy. Mmmmmm

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  2. Looks like a balanced diet.

    I mean, 10 different foods there. Gotta be 5 or 6 different food groups represented...

    ReplyDelete

  4. Reading this post makes me want to obsessively check my weight till the scale crashes AND reach for a Cinnabon at the same time.

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  5. Hahaha dunkaroos are the BEST - especially because I only got them on special occasions. And I still love ellios. And cake, but that should go without saying.

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  6. I. love. your. honesty. It's great.

    ReplyDelete

  7. That literally sounds like my nutritional diet as a kid. And, yes, I used to be fat too.

    ReplyDelete

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